...Sam stood on the bank of the pond, staring into the water. On the other side, a family of loons searched for food among the reeds. A beaver swam toward its lodge carrying a branch. The young loons, some of them paddling in the water, some on the backs of the parents, seemed, to Sam, to be content: a feeling that was far from him at that moment.

He reached down and scratched Wolf’s ear. The animal was watching the birds and the rodent.

“You leave them be,” Sam said. “You got no cause to be hunting them. I feed you well enough.”

Wolf looked up and whined, shifting his weight from paw to paw, as if to say, “Yeah, but the wolf part of me wants to hunt.”

Wolf turned his head away from the pond. Sam followed his gaze. He heard a noise. Garrett was approaching from the direction of the thicket where, apparently, Todd still lay sleeping. He turned back to the pond. Garrett walked up behind him, encircling Sam’s waist with his strong arms, burying his face in his neck, caressing him. Sam leaned back into the embrace with a deep sigh and closed his eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Garrett’s deep voice resonated throughout Sam’s body.

Sam sighed again. He turned without breaking the hold in which Garrett held him. He looked deeply up into the eyes of the man he could no longer deny he had feelings for.

“I love you,” Sam said simply. When he said these words, however, he felt turmoil inside.

Garrett smiled and kissed him. He looked at Sam with his head cocked to one side. He reminded Sam of Wolf, when his faithful companion was trying to understand the strange vocalizations his master was uttering.

Garrett said, “But?”

“But?” Sam repeated.

“I love you, but…” Garrett said. “I know there’s a ‘but’ in there someplace. Not as cute as this butt, though.” He dropped his hands and gave Sam’s bottom a squeeze.

“Garrett, I’m serious.” Sam broke the embrace and walked a few steps away.

“I know you are,” said the wagon master. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re right,” Sam said. “There is a ‘but.’” Sam leaned his shoulder against a willow tree on the bank. Garrett walked up behind him once more and also leaned against a limb with one hand, waiting for Sam to continue.

Sam took his time. Still staring at the family of loons, he said, “I love you, but…I love Todd, too.” He turned to Garrett. “I can see Todd loves you and yet he says he loves me. How can I love you and Todd? How can you love each other and me?”

Garrett smiled and pulled Sam against his chest. Sam laid his head on the man’s broad shoulder, and, for an instant, felt as if he were one of the loon chicks secure on the strong back of his father.

After a minute had passed, Garrett said. “You got the wrong idea about love, my man.”

Sam raised his head and looked up into Garrett’s face. “I don’t understand.”

Garrett pressed Sam’s head back down against his shoulder. “You think love has to be a permanent thing, that it’s exclusive between two people.”

Sam wrinkled his brow against Garrett’s breast, trying to understand.

Garrett continued, “Love can be permanent and exclusive, but it don’t have to be. Love is a feelin’. You can’t control havin’ it, any more than you can control not havin’ it. If I love you, it don’t mean I shouldn’t or can’t love Todd, or Gus, or even a hundred other people. And to try not to feel it when it’s there, as plain as the nose on your face, it can make you miserable inside. Especially if you think it’s wrong to feel that way.

Garrett paused. Sam thought about what he had just heard. It made sense to him on some level. When he had been with Nils, though, he had felt love for none other and felt no desire for any other love. But there, he didn’t have others to love. There was just him and Nils. Would he have loved Garrett if he had been there as well?

“Another thing about love,” Garrett was continuing. “It don’t have to last forever. If you feel it for someone for an hour, a day, or a week, and then it goes, that’s all right. It ain’t wrong to have it be for a short time. It’s a good feeling and should be shared and enjoyed. Not something to be ashamed of or regret if it don’t last. So, if you love someone, tell ’em. You’ll both feel good.”

Sam raised his head once more.

“I love you, Sam,” said Garrett.